I was on a panel a few weeks ago discussing millenials in the workplace. How we think, how we work, and how we are changing things. Leading the panel was a millennial expert. A seriously brilliant woman who knows more about my generation than I do. And I am living it.

She talked about historical events that have shaped my generation. She talked about September Eleventh, the first time in centuries that Americans were attacked on American soil. She talked about what my generation grew up in and what shaped us. The uncertainty. The lack of security.

Let me be honest when I say that up until that point I had really never considered the way in which September Eleventh shaped me. I was fourteen when it happened. I was on my way to the doctor to get stitches when I heard the news. I kind of shrugged my shoulders and moved on. Sure, I watched CNN like everyone else. Sure, we talked about it in school for days but I really didn’t get it.

I didn’t get it because at fourteen and it was all I had ever known.

I hadn’t known a time when buildings weren’t getting blown up (Oklahoma Bombing). When schools weren’t being attacked (Columbine). And when buildings weren’t getting planes flown in to them. I am sure that had I lived in or near New York the event would have felt very differently. But I didn’t. And it wasn’t close to me. And I viewed it as I had every other tragic event in history.

Yet, I sincerly wanted to feel more. I felt guilty for not crying. I felt naive for not knowing what these buildings were or even being able to define terrorism. Or even caring to look it up.

But, I was fourteen and in my mind violence was violence. Destruction was destruction. This stuff happens.

As I remember September Eleventh I don’t remember being overcome with emotion. I remember feeling guilty for not feeling much emotion.

As I move forward from September Eleventh I hope. I pray. I believe. That the next generation can and should be raised in a country where violent acts don’t just happen. Where tragic events aren’t commonplace. A country where they can feel things in the true nature of feeling. That they can understand the value of life. And that as a country we can provide them with this.

That is what I am thinking about today.