Jessica Gottlieb: A Letter To 20 Something self
ByLast fall I had the pleasure of having dinner with Jessica and her family. She is completely right in saying that she sees the world differently than everyone around her.
She does.
I was ecstatic when Jessica told me that she would write a letter for me. Jessica is that friend that every young women needs. The friend that will give you a hug and an understanding nod when needed but a kick in the butt when it is called for. She will cheer you on and set you straight all at the same time. In the short time that I have known her she has helped shape the person that I am today. From the way that I parent to the way that I approach the world. She has shaped my writing and my grammar and my belief in myself.
She is wicked smart and one of the strongest women that I know. She stands up for what she believes without taking herself too seriously. A talent that few have.
When I am her age I hope to have half of the strength and confidence that fills this woman.
A letter from Jessica Gottlieb:
Jessica,
You made the right decision with school. Keep working hard, and don’t take out any loans. I know it’s hard right now, but graduating without debt will jumpstart you. Skip the kinesiology and just get a degree in recreation, you’re going to hate teaching. You’re also never really going to need that degree for anything except admittance into your Master’s, so don’t sweat it.
Keep cycling. Cycling and camping will be the highlight of your twenties, only be more careful when you pick a place to pee. It’s really hard to deal with poison ivy when you’re camping.
Spend more time naked. I know you feel like you’re not perfect, but you never will be, and things will never be better than this. Enjoy your freedom, you’ll be having babies in a few short years, and the first years you’re living on an island.
You’re going to start a wildly successful business with a $500 prepaid visa card. You’re also going to watch it tank in a recession, get out early, it’s just a business, it’s not your identity.
You see the world a little differently than everyone else. I still don’t know why, but twenty years later I’ve stopped trying to answer that question. Be yourself, you’re weird, and you’re going to get weirder. It’s okay. No one cares enough to make a difference.
Oh also, you’re going to meet a really nice guy who is going to take you helicopter skiing, and send you mountains of flowers. He is bad news. Trust your instincts. You’re going to marry a poor man, and you’re going to be madly in love fifteen years later. Building something side by side with a good man is infinitely better than being given everything by a not so good man.
Pick a few close friends, demand loyalty, and give more than you take.
Ask forgiveness and not permission.
With love,
Your Forty Year Old Self
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I love this! What a great idea, and that letter is full of excellent advice! Love this line “Be yourself, you’re weird, and you’re going to get weirder.”
Yes.
Will Jessica write a letter for me too?
I feel like this letter was written FOR me. My favorite line is “Building something side by side with a good man is infinitely better than being given everything by a not so good man.” I will be passing that along to my daughter. Thank you for this post!
Those last 2 sentances were great! I like the idea of giving more than you take… I’d want to be your friend :-) and only having a few. I feel like it is so hard to maintain the relationships since those I want to have become long-distance. I have too many virtual friends to count and who I don’t care too deeply for and the same back to me.
Ask for forgiveness and not permission is such great advice!! Just do it!
Thank you for sharing!
That was an awesome letter to yourself, I lived reading that. Imagine we could go back in time and hand ourselves letters from the future… Hmmm…